I am still addicted to social media, trying to wane off of it.
I have been since before it even existed.
At my college, eight years before facebook existed, we had an online network called “Learnlink” and I had forums on there and spent far too much time on it. Being online for social connections always appealed to me, because for someone shy, it is easier than having to call someone to spend time with them, or risk rejection.
I had always had a love of writing, and sharing ideas.
This has never left me.
And the want to help change the world that I still see as needing to change because, globally, as a community, I feel that we are on a course of distraction, mostly unhealthy to most people’s psychology, that ethically needs to change, whether it be due to environmental or wealth disparity or social beliefs.
Whether or not I should instead find solace internally, I have found at an early age that I am happiest when I am helping others, and part of this ties into making art to help others, including writing and filmmaking, which I see as intertwined.
I wanted to be the next Michael Moore or Frederick Wiseman, starting in high school, and I think, achieving some form of fame or feedback even, knowing that I was making a ripple, I became addicted to it.
Social media makes this hit of feedback buzz so much easier than traditional means, such as slogging for months and years on a film.
And I am aware of this, so which starts my cycle.
I quit facebook 4 times, then came back to it. Because, well, that hit of dopamine makes the internal unhappiness of my self fade for an hour or a day.
But I know this is wrong, so I try to quit.
And right now, I try to just spend 10 minutes on it a day.
Also part of the problem is that social media is an excellent resource. Like other camera forums like CML and Cinematography.net, there is a lot of good discussion and ways to learn from all this.
And this is tough, to quit that, to lose the knowledge and resources, but to gain time.
To try to limit the drug, that’s all we can do, I guess. To try to be conscious of it. To not quit cold-turkey, but be as conscious as possible of the good and bad of it.